It’s been a few weeks since I updated on the state of my family, and perhaps you’re thinking that husband made another comment about my lengthy to-do list and all hell broke loose around here. So, I thought I’d let you know how we’re all faring during continued togetherness.
Finally, I think we’re really hitting our stride around here, firing on all cylinders if you will. After 10 weeks of lockdown, EVERYONE put on pants and brushed their teeth today. I’m going to count that as a win and pour myself a glass of celebratory wine.
HARRIS UNIVERSITY– This was our last week of homeschool (for now) and we skidded in sideways, bruised, beaten and completely worn down. Each of my children learned a valuable lesson about their futures…they will not succeed in their chosen career if they are required to work from home. Here are a few of their stories:
**In Fort Collins where we live, a rite of passage for all 5th graders is Eco-Week. In essence, it’s a retreat for 3 days to “learn” about ecology and the environment. These kids look forward to it beginning in Kindergarten, not because of the content (snooze), but because it’s a camping trip without their parents. AND IT’S CO-ED!! Well, for obvious reasons, eco-week was cancelled this year. But, in a move I will never quite understand, the teachers decided to punish the children and have an online version. So, instead of telling dirty jokes and scary stories with her classmates in the outdoors, Reese was forced to have a virtual campfire in our living room with her mom. You’ve never seen a sadder 11-year-old. At least I made s’mores in the microwave.
**Teenager continued cooking his Michelin-star level recipes from his International Cooking class. Our summer beach vacation was cancelled, but it’s no big deal because we’ve traveled the world and have eaten some “delicious” cuisine. He is forbidden from registering for any class in the fall that takes place in the kitchen…just in case this pandemic continues into the next school year.
**My sweet 1st Grader was OVER homeschooling. She filled out an online survey about her new teacher and gave her all poor ratings. I have a whiteboard calendar in my office to keep track of this circus and even found this written on a day last week:
I don’t think I’m going to get the Teacher of the Year award.
HOUSEHOLD HAPPENINGS– Because of all of the time spent wandering around the house, I’ve organized myself into a frenzy. The Container Store keeps sending me emails with product suggestions and before I know it, I’ve ordered bins to organize everyone’s underwear. Also, with no restaurants open, I’ve cooked and cooked. And then cooked some more. My trips to the grocery store have been few and far between though, which has led to some serious panic buying…but not in the way you’d think. I don’t give two shits about stocking up on toilet paper or cleaning supplies. But, Cream of Tartar? That we CANNOT run out of, no matter what. Not sure if we have poppy seeds for the one recipe I make every 6 months? Better buy another jar.
Also, apparently we eat a lot of tacos.
And, don’t even get me started on husband’s stockpile of condiments and meat thermometers.
One last thing before I go back to those underwear drawers…I am wondering if anyone else’s husband has the special superpower for knowing exactly when to offer to help with household chores. My better half has a knack for walking in when I am 98.5% finished with a job (i.e. folding laundry, washing dishes) and asks “Oh, can I help?” It’s like a sixth sense he has and even more puzzling is that he is not deterred by the swear words and death stare I give. I’m pretty sure there’s a “Husband Handbook” and this bullshit is included in “Chapter 2: How to Ensure You Sleep On The Couch.”
And on that note, my celebratory glass of wine is empty. Later.
